5 Tips for the Busy Bride Who Wants to Write Her Own Vows

For the bride with a to-do list that never seems to be fully checked off and who has reminder notifications buzzing across her iPhone every hour, this wedding vow writing guide is for you. Planning your wedding can be overwhelming and stressful. When you acknowledge which parts of your wedding are most significant to you, like writing your own vows, you can create a plan for how to achieve those items of highest importance. Here are five tips for the busy bride who wants to write her own vows.

Tip #1: Schedule It: One of my favorite lady boss powerhouses, Marie Forleo, loves to say, “If it’s not scheduled, it’s not real.” I couldn’t agree more. Schedule time on your calendar for wedding vow writing. Book time based on how you work best. Do you make the most progress in smaller twenty to thirty minute increments or do you prefer to bunker down for two hours straight?

Also, get specific with your calendar appointment titles. Instead of just scheduling time under, “vow writing” try to title the time with the specific thing you plan to work on like, “brainstorm topics for vows” or “write five different first sentences and choose one to continue with.” Getting specific with your calendar titles will make it easier when it’s time for you to sit down and do the work. Taking action on an appointment labeled, “wedding vow writing” is a huge task. You may still feel too overwhelmed to begin. But when you get specific, you’ll have a clear direction on what you need to accomplish during the time you’ve booked for yourself and you’re more likely to follow through.

Tip #2: Use an Organization Tool: I have countless action items running through my mind at any given moment. Don’t even get me started on the rainbow of stickie notes covering my desk. I can’t keep track of everything! The mental clutter can make me feel like a hot mess.

That’s when I turn to Trello, my organizational tool of choice. The boards are visually pleasing and it’s simple to use. You can easily create cards and checklists for every step of the vow writing process to track your progress. Plus, Trello offers several templates to start with so you don’t even have to build your own.

Check out this blog post from Trello—how to plan a wedding using Trello. It shows how to use this tool to organize every part of your wedding planning, not just vow writing. This article includes tips for how to keep track of wedding day timelines, seating arrangements, and even communicating with the bridal party and wedding planner.

Tip #3: Start Early: Once you become engaged, it’s never too early to start writing your own vows. When you add vow writing to the list of initial wedding planning tasks instead of waiting until a few days before your wedding to write your vows, the stress and anxiety will fade. You’ll have plenty of time to work out every step of the wedding vow writing process by starting months before your wedding day. For a detailed outline of what and when you should be writing throughout your engagement, this ultimate timeline guide for writing your own vows will help.

Tip #4: Embrace the Mantra, Progress Over Perfect: Perfection is the killer of getting stuff done. Once you embrace one of my favorite mantra’s, “progress over perfect,” things on that to-do list of yours will quickly get crossed off. Just start writing your own vows. It doesn’t (and won’t) be perfect right away. Don’t sweat it. This doesn’t mean your vows won’t evolve into the magical words you want for the big day. You just don’t want the standard of perfect to prevent you from even starting. Lean into things being half-baked in the beginning.

Then the sheer act of starting will give you the momentum to keep going. It’s what I like to call the compound effect. Starting the project will lead you to revisiting the project, which will lead you to polishing, rewriting, editing, and before you know it your wedding vows will be ready for your ceremony. You just have to begin with those fragmented sentences in order to get to that polished point of wedding vow gold.

Tip #5: Hire a Wedding Vow Writer: Sometimes you can put every productivity practice into place but there just isn’t enough time in the day to accomplish everything. Just like you plan to buy a wedding dress instead of sewing your own, you can turn to a professional to help write your wedding vows too. As a professional wedding vow writer and creator of Wedding Words, I collaborate with couples to help write beautiful, custom wedding vows. We’ll work together every step of the way as I take your unique love story and articulate it. Let’s connect now. I can't wait to hear about your love.