Your son has requested that you give a father of the groom speech at his upcoming wedding.
This can be both an incredible honor and a terrifying concept.
Imagine standing up in front of everyone you know plus new family and friends. All eyes are you on. It’s time to impress the guests and most importantly, your son.
But how do you write and deliver a father of the groom speech that will leave a lasting and fond memory? How do you strike that difficult balance between humor and seriousness? How do you get your thoughts organized and actually articulate what you’re feeling?
As a professional wedding vow and toast writer, I’m here to help you write and recite a father of the groom speech that you’ll feel both confident and excited to deliver.
The hardest part about writing a father of the groom speech is understanding how to get started.
What’s our advice? Get organized and then get to writing!
Tip #1: Follow a Father of the Groom Speech Outline
The most effective and efficient way to get started on a speech is to follow some sort of guide.
Check out the key parts to our father of the groom speech writing outline:
Thank the Guests
Talk about your Son
Talk about your New Daughter or Son-in-Law
Communicate Why You’re Excited for Their Marriage
End with a Wish for the Couple
Tip #2: Introduce Yourself
Start off your speech by communicating who you are to everyone. While many guests will already know you, there will be plenty of people in the room who do not.
State your name and your relationship to the couple.
Examples of how to start your father of the groom speech:
Good evening, everyone. My name is Derek and I’m the father of the groom.
Welcome! To my new family and friends, I’m Joe and I’m the father of the groom.
If this is a same-sex wedding and there are two grooms, be sure to get even more specific than simply stating that you’re the father of the groom.
Additional introduction examples:
My name is Charles and I’m Jack’s father.
My name is Kenny and Seth is my son.
Tip #3: Thank the Guests
Next, show appreciation to your guests for celebrating with you.
As the father of the groom, you are seen as a sort of host at the wedding. And a host will give thanks for their guests attendance.
Examples of how to thank your guests:
I’d like to thank you all for being here to celebrate with me today.
Thank you all for joining my wife and I as we celebrate this joyous occasion.
Thank you for being here to witness my son as he takes this milestone into marriage.
Tip #4: Communicate Details about Your Son
As the father of the groom, you’ll want to highlight your son right away.
What should this section of your father of the groom speech include?
There are two main things you should be sure to cover:
Qualities and characteristics of your son: Describe his personality and traits that you admire about him
Anecdotal stories: Relive funny and especially memorable stories from his childhood
Once you’ve written about your son and detailed a specific story, then use that concept and tie it to into his partner and marriage.
Examples for how to talk about your son:
Todd has always been such a hardworking and dedicated person. Even at just 11 years old, he set up an art stand at the end of our driveway to showcase his drawings. He’d ask our neighbors to bid on his work and then he’d happily deliver it to the highest bidder. I guess it shouldn’t have surprised his mother and I when he went on to become an art seller. He knows when he’s found something beautiful and special and that’s what led him to marry Lindsey today.
Jake has always enjoyed the element of surprise. Whether it was jumping out of closets to scare his brothers or planning a “surprise” anniversary party for my wife and I—which occurred every year by the way—he loves a good surprise. Perhaps it’s the excitement of it or the bonding experience that inevitably happens between him and the person he surprises. I hope that Jake and his new wife live a life full of surprises that bring them plenty of excitement and may their bond grow stronger because of these moments.
Tip #5: Talk about Your New Daughter or Son-in-Law
Within your father of the groom speech, it’s important to also highlight details about your son’s spouse.
Follow the same format that we noted above for this section but now, focus on your new daughter or son-in-law.
Examples of how to include your son’s spouse into your speech:
I can remember the first time I met Candace. She came over for a summer cookout. I fired up the grill and before I could put the steaks down, she grabbed the tray from my hands and took over. I can’t lie—those were the best cooked steaks I’ve ever had in my life. And I knew from that moment on, not only would my son be well-fed but he’d always be taken by surprise in the most wonderful of ways.
As a father, all I have ever wanted for Evan was to feel loved. Jason, when we met, I saw a man with the biggest heart and the most compassionate attitude. Here, I thought, is a man that will love my son for all of who he is and for all of his days.
Tip #6: Explain Why Their Marriage Excites You
Everyone from the guests to the new spouse will be curious to know—what do you think of this couple as they enter into marriage? How does this make you feel?
This is the section of your father of the groom toast is where you’ll answer these questions.
Detail out why you’re happy that they’re married and what hopes and wishes you have for them throughout their entire marriage.
Examples of how to detail out wishes for their marriage:
My wife and I have been married for 38 years. Throughout that time, I’ve learned that there are three key ingredients to a happy marriage. Communicate with each other clearly, kiss each other daily, and always—always share your dessert.
I am so grateful you have found each other and can celebrate a lifetime of laughter, happiness, and love together.
Tip #7: End with a Wish for the Couple
The number one way to ensure you have a killer speech is to close with a powerful last line. If you have a strong last line, your guests will remember your father of the groom speech as a winner!
Aim to keep it to one sentence. Try to make it a short sentence. And finally, it should pack a lot of punch.
Examples of last lines for a father of the groom speech:
I’m so grateful that my Broadway star has found his leading lady.
May your marriage be full of more love than you can experience in this lifetime.
I’m so thankful and excited to now have two sons in the family.
To my wonderful son and my new daughter—I love you both.
Tip #8: Practice Reciting Your Speech
Once you’ve finished writing your speech, practice reading it out loud. I recommend reading the speech three to six times before the wedding date.
This will help you feel more confident and comfortable when it’s time to actually recite your father of the groom speech. Plus, you’ll start to sort of memorize the speech which will allow you to look more natural on the wedding day.
Do not plan to read the speech off of your phone or a tablet. It looks tacky and it’s distracting. Instead, print your speech on paper. Be sure to have multiple copies with you in case you lose one or if food or drink spill on your original copy.
Tip #9: Make Sure There is a Microphone
No matter how loud you are, you will not be clearly heard without the help of a microphone. It’s surprising but many venues are not prepared to share a microphone with guests.
Coordinate with the groom in advance to make sure the proper equipment will be available for you to use.
And be sure to speak loudly and slowly when it’s time to give your father of the groom toast. Even with a microphone, it’s important to project so every guest from the head table to the back table can hear you.
Tip #10: Use a Professional Speech Writer
Are you still overwhelmed and stuck? Maybe it’s time to turn to a professional wedding speech writer for help.
At Wedding Words, I work with parents of the bride and groom to write custom speeches that capture their unique story. I know I can help you write a memorable and impactful father of the groom speech.
Get in touch to see how we could work together.